Marijuana is a schedule 1 drug, higher up the list than coke, since it has a high potential for abuse, no accepted medical use in the US and its unsafe.
Tobacco fits that category to a T.
It’s patent bollocks when Ivy League CEO’s testify that they don’t know what makes water boil. It’s patent bollocks when in addition to rapacious taxes, the government whacks these killers with multi-million dollar lawsuits and then lets them carry on doing what they do.
Tobacco use is rampant.
Tobacco users need to be registered with the state and be required to carry an ID card. They can only get the tobacco they need from state run dispensaries, and these dispensaries should be as appealing as all government institutions that deal with the needy.
The registration process should be invasive and grueling – true addicts will put up with any shit to get their fix.
Their insurance companies should be notified.
Anyone with tobacco paraphernalia on them or in their house that does not have their card on them is subject to confiscation and prosecution. Rental companies can evict illegal tobacco users. Insurance companies can raise rates.
If you are convicted of illegal tobacco use, your second offense requires mandatory registration. Part of the criminal proceedings will be the registration process. You will be required to carry a card, even in prison. With this card, you can go to private smoking areas to smoke government issue cigarettes, you will no longer be required to give blowjobs or take it up the ass to get your snout.
The government should stop fucking about with the tobacco industry and just take ‘em out. All that tax that the government is raking off of tobacco will continue to go straight to them. State run tobacco farms in Virginia and Cuba will keep supply costs low. The price of cigarettes will fall since big Tobacco is no longer getting their slice.
There will be state run detox facilities for kickers. You can sign in even if you are not a registered smoker. Once you are signed in you are left to purge the nicotine out of your system for 5 days. You are now clean. You are past the chemical addiction phase, your body recovers quickly. You are then mandatorily tested every week and subject to random tests. If you are a recovering smoker, you carry a card. While you have this card, prescribed medications to help you recover are free, and insurance companies are required to start lowering your rates. Recovering smokers gym memberships (or equivalent aerobic activities) are subsidized to a maximum of $1000 a year, deductible directly from their taxes.
There will be ‘Smokers Gregarious’ meetings, where people will hang about in bars getting legally drunk, or coffee shops getting legally wired and proclaim “My name is Michael Caine and I am a Smoker” (Oblique reference here to the Madness song, and that he quit right before his 70th birthday and that since there seems to be currently no shame in smoking, nobody really gives a fuck if you say it)
After 5 years clean, you are no longer required to carry a card.
People will grow their own just like people cook meth and grow weed. It’s not a problem. You treat all illegal producers the same way – whether it’s the way we treat marijuana growers or the way we treat meth cooks is immaterial, somewhere in that scale fits the rogue tobacconist.
We need to stigmatize smokers the way we stigmatized queers and niggers. They are easy enough to spot – they can’t get very far on COPD lungs before they have to light up, and they are truly the most reprehensible of addicts – dirty, unhealthy, hooked through the gills.
We started showing images of what smoking does to lungs and throats and children.
We need to STOP that immediately.
Smoking will die down on it’s own. There will always be a proportion of society that will do it, but it will become as obscene as a heroin junkie shooting up between his filthy toes.
If we glamorize it on TV with pictures of carcinoma riddled organs being culled from filthy smokers, the effect will be dulled. It happens with porn, it happens with gunplay on TV. Too much is never enough, it needs to be wild, outrageous and vivid.
Do not do this with smoking. There’s nothing glamorous about breathing through a hole in your throat, or having your tongue cut out or smelling like death.
